Ten Ways to Make a Delinquent (Guaranteed to Work!)

The police department of Houston, Texas, gave the following ten rules for raising delinquent children.

1. Begin with infancy to give the child everything he wants. In this way he will grow up to believe the world owes him a living.

2. When he picks up bad words, laugh at him. This will make him think he is cute. It will also encourage him to pick up “gutter” phrases that will blow the top off your head later.

3. Never give him any spiritual training. Wait until he is twenty-one and then let him “decide for himself”.

The funny thing is that I was surprised when I realized that the cruizer was the size of a normal car! I'm 5'9", but somehow I was expecting the car to be too big.

A teenager’s nightmare? Sr. Maria Philomena in now-retired-Lieutenant (NH State Trooper) Kelly’s cruiser. (Sister adds: The funny thing is that I was surprised that the cruiser was the size of a normal car! I’m 5’9″, but somehow I expected the car to be too big. Heroes still loom large! My students took this picture in 2004.)

4. Avoid use of the word WRONG. It may develop a guilt complex. This will condition him to believe later, when he is arrested for stealing a car, that society is against him and he is being persecuted.

5. Pick up everything he leaves lying around — books, shoes, toys and clothes. Do everything for him so that he will be experienced in throwing all responsibility on others.

6. Let him read any printed matter he can get his hands on. Be careful that the silverware and drinking glasses are sterilized, but let his mind feast on garbage.

7. Quarrel frequently in his presence. In this way he will not be shocked when the home is broken up later.

8. Give a child all the spending money he wants. Never let him earn his own. Why should he have things as tough as you had them?

9. Satisfy his every craving for food, drink, and comfort. Denial may lead to harmful frustrations.

10. Take his part against neighbors, teachers, policemen. They are all prejudiced against your child.